Love by Javarica


It was raining cats and dogs. I hardly saw anything. All I could hear was the sound of rain hammering the wind screen and the wipers. I was in a hurry. My son’s birthday party would start any minute. I could not miss that moment. It was the day when he turned sixteen.
            Suddenly, the phone rang. It was Daniel!
            “I am on my way, sweetheart. Five minutes, please. I won’t let you down this time. I have made a promise, remember?” the sweet talk came out from my mouth. I heard his chuckles. “You know how much Mum loves you, Daniel”.
            Finally, I reached home. Daniel was waiting for me at the gate with an umbrella in his hand. In great haste, I unleashed my seat belt and opened the door.
            “Daniel! It is raining outside here! Why won’t you wait inside with your sister? You may get sick by staying here in the rain!” I said in a loud voice. Daniel did not say a word.  He got into the car and I steered it to the porch.
            “Dania, why did you let your brother go outside? You know it is raining,” I asked.
            “But, Mum…,” before she could finish, I shouted at her, “Taking care of your brother is not that hard, Dania! Not for me, not even after sixteen years!”
            “Oh, Mum! Dania did nothing wrong. I am the one who went outside without telling her. She doesn’t know anything. She thought I was in the room with Papa.”
            I let out a sigh of relief.
            “I am very sorry, Mum,” said Dania.
            “No, I am. I should not have shouted at you. I was wrong,” I replied.
            “Yes, shouting is rude,” Daniel interrupted.
            We laughed.
            “That is right, darling,” I said with a smile.
            Daniel is a special kid. When he was born, he was diagnosed with Down Syndrome. My heart broke into pieces when the doctor told me about it.
            When Daniel was a baby, I did not carry him like other mothers do. I did not understand why I must be the mother of a Down Syndrome child. I was ashamed of him. I did not breast-feed him for two months. My aunt, who had been looking after me, was disappointed with my attitude towards Daniel. Dania saw the situation in a different light. She loved to hold Daniel despite his frailty. She was not ashamed of him at all. At one time after Daniel had taken his bath, Dania kissed him and said, “My love!” Daniel let out a chuckle, as if he understood what Dania was saying. My heart melted when I saw that beautiful scene.  It opened my heart to accept the fact.
            I remember the date, 14 July very well. It was the first time I held Daniel in my arms. I looked into his face and was struck by how sweet he was. Yes, he is still sweet. Tears rolled down my cheeks. How could I be so mean towards this beautiful creation of God? Daniel stared deeply into my eyes as if he was saying: I forgive you, Mum. Crying very hard, I hugged him as close as I could. Dania, who had been searching for Daniel, saw everything.  She ran to us and shared the hug.
             I have learned to love and accept Daniel. From that day onwards, I treat Daniel the same as I treat Dania, so both of them get equal love from their mother.
            Taking care of Daniel sometimes makes me impatient. Once, I canned him for drawing on my paper work which I needed to present to my client the next day. Luckily, Dania was there and dragged my hand to one side. She was very upset with me and refused to talk to me for almost one whole day. I felt guilty for canning Daniel. I went to Dania’s room. “Dania, Daniel?” They were fast asleep. Daniel slept soundly beside Dania, hugging each other. I rushed inside and took a seat beside them. My two angels, I said in my heart. Silent tears filled my eyes and I gradually fell asleep.
            “Mum!” said Daniel, shaking my shoulder. I was in reality again, awakened from the memories. Tears burst afresh from my eyes.
            “Why are you crying, Mum?” Both of my children stared at me, waiting for my answer.
            “Nothing, love,” I said, trying to hide my emotions with a smile.
            “Come, your cake is ready! Chocolate cake with strawberries on top. Your favourite, right? I asked and winked. Both Daniel and Dania cheered.
            If I were asked to choose between Daniel and Dania, I would spare my life in return. Choosing between my children is like choosing between the devil and the deep blue sea. It is a difficult decision because my love towards my children is always the same.

                                                                                  Javarica Dee Linna Jack
                                                                                  5 Dalton 1

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