My student's Writing I

Love

          There were no stars shining in the dark sky. The Moon was hidden among the dark clouds. Thunder rumbled and lightening flashed across the sky. It was a dark night as I lay on my bed, looking at the fan spinning. On my left hand was a bottle of medicine. Everything felt so empty after she was gone. It was hard to believe she had left me just like that, with a little note saying she was dead. Before I decided to end my life here, memories of me and her came flooding back to my mind.

          “Jacob! Jacob! Wake up! Tuition’s over!”

          I could barely feel something poking me. When I opened my eyes, it was my angel, Hazel. She stood there in front of me, her long hair silky and her smile sweet as usual. I felt so blessed to have met a girl like her.

          “Stop dreaming and please go wash your face. Ew!” she said as she handed me a tissue paper. I was drooling in my sleep.  Tuitions were wearing me out as there were innumerable exercise sheets lying in wait for me to complete on my desk.

          After cleaning my face, I took Hazel for a walk at the beach. Our friends were there, too. The sunset scenery was so wonderful. Hazel and I sat on a log. The feelings of having her by my side were really wonderful. Life would be so prosaic without her. But I had never thought of losing her.

          In the breeze, her hair was streaming loose. I curled a strand of her hair behind her ear. And there she was, giving me a loving smile as she looked at me in the eyes. Hazel then joined her friends playing at the beach, scribbling some words on the white sandy beach.  When our friends were going back, we both took our private time together. She was collecting sea shells along the beach. I brought her to the place where I had scribbled my vow of love and she said, “I’ll remember this forever”.

          Our love grew stronger with each passing day. We were always filled with blissfulness at the sight of each other in school. Everything went well until one day, she didn’t go to school. I was worried sick because she neither answered my calls nor replied my texts. Life in school without her accompanying me was so boring. I missed her cheerful smile. I tried to contact her house phone, but still there was no answer. I started losing my patience when she didn’t come to school for two weeks in a row. I decided to call her brother.

         “Hello? Is Hazel there? Is there a chance for me to talk to her?” I said.

         “Hello. Hazel? Umm……..”

         A silent pause was on the other end. It gave me bad vibes. What was she hiding from me?

          “What? What is wrong with Hazel? Tell me.”

          “Jacob, you might want to come to St. Daniel’s Hospital, now… Actually, Hazel’s now fighting with death. She’s dying…”

          Hearing the word “dying” really made my pulse stop. Dying? How? Why? She looked really fine the last time I saw her. I quickly rushed to the hospital with my parents. I knew examination was coming soon, and there were plenty of tuitions to be attended but right now all that mattered was my Hazel.

          I rushed to her ward and saw her lying on the bad. She was so pale and weak. But still, she gave me the smile I had been missing since the day she was absent from school. Her body was so frail and thin. She looked so drained of life. My mind was filled with question marks. Her long silky hair had turned to a short retro hair cut. Everything about her changed all of a sudden.

          Sitting by her side, I spoke out my concern, “My…what has happened, dear? Are you okay?”

          She looked at me with tears streaming down her sunken cheeks. But I did not get it, she was smiling. She did not bother to answer my questions. The nurse came in and wanted to take her to the operation room. I was confused. Why was she doing this to me? What was her sickness? Before she left the room, she wished to hug me. She gave me a long-tight-warm hug while saying, “I will never forget you, not in a million years…” She gave me a peck on my cheek before being carried into the operation room.

          I wanted to wait for her but it was already late. My parents insisted me to go home. I was so frustrated that no one told me anything about Hazel’s sickness. Everyone was hiding it from me.

         I couldn’t sleep well that night. I prayed that everything was going to be okay tomorrow. The moment I finished school, I rushed to the hospital with a bouquet of a dozen red roses, which was her favorite. I was very anxious to know her condition. There, I saw her bed neatly made. But where was she? I was praying that she was already at home, safe and sound. I went and asked the nurse about her whereabouts at the front counter.

         “Where is Hazel Jennifer in room 1610?”

          “Your name please…,” the tall nurse said.

          “Jacob, Jacob Kristen.”

          “Oh… I’m sorry, Jacob. Miss Hazel is gone already. She left you a letter. So sorry for your loss…,”

         I lost my grip of the bouquet of roses and it fell to the ground. The news tore me apart. She had been fighting a serious brain tumor for the past few months. But she kept it silent from me. She didn’t want to tell me because she doesn’t want her sickness ruins our fruitful relationship. There was nothing I could do anymore to bring her back alive.

          I went back home with a broken heart. This happened so quickly. I never thought I would lose her this fast. Warm tears kept flowing from my eyes. I missed her so much. I entered the room and locked the door. I threw the letter she gave and the roses on the floor and flung myself on the bed. I felt so empty without her night calls; without listening to her dear voice to sleep. I decided to end my life with the bottle of medicine I held onto. I swallowed them bit by bit. I didn’t care what was I doing but all I knew was I missed her so much and I wanted to see her again. My visions got so blurred and my mind was very dizzy. I closed my eyes slowly as I knew I was about to leave this mean world.  The bottle fell on the floor; breaking into thousand pieces. I could hardly hear my parents coming up the stairs. My body felt so weak. Once again, darkness swallowed me.

          “Dear…”

          I looked around, and all I could see was a pathway where I used to walk with Hazel every evening. Why was I here? How could I get here? I missed this place. The place seemed so lifeless. Then, as I looked around that place, I could sense someone walking towards my way. I rubbed my eyes. I was dumbfounded. I could not believe what I saw. It was my sweetheart Hazel, indeed.
          “Hey… How are you?” she said as she looked straight into my eyes.

          “How am I? Could you imagine me grieving my heart out over the loss of you? How confused and lost I have been without you? Why did you do that to me? Why wouldn’t you tell me your sickness? You told me you loved me, but why did you go away? I miss you…” I replied, my tears bursting forth like a ruptured dam. I couldn’t help it. I just couldn’t accept the fact she had left me just like that.

          Seeing me crying, she gently wiped off the tears with her soft hands. “Dear, I didn’t leave you. No, I wouldn’t if I could. I have no choice. Please don’t be like this. Be strong… Nothing’s changed; no one can take your place. I’ll be waiting for you up there. I’ll wait forever.”

          “How can I be strong without you by my side? I feel so lost and empty. If only I could have just one wish, I’d had you by my side. Please don’t go. Stay with me…”

          “If you miss me, look up to the sky. I’ll be watching you there. I’ll be smiling looking at you. If you love me, please live up your life for me. Please? Do it for me. If you cry over my death, I’ll feel sad. You would not want me being sad right? Although we’re apart from each other, but never a day I will forget you. You have my heart, and you’ll forever have it. Promise me you would live your life for me?” She said holding my hands tightly.

          “If it’s for you, my dear, I promise.”

         “That’s how I like it,” She said while smiling.

         Seeing her smiling made me happy. It cheered me up. We were walking along the pathway hand-in-hand. I could feel the warmth of her hands. It felt great to have her by my side.

          “Jacob, I’m going back now.” She said, breaking the silence.

          “What? Where?”

         She pointed her index finger towards heaven and shouted, “Up there!”

         “But, I don’t want you to leave! Stay Hazel, with me,” I pleaded. Then, I could feel my eyes starting to fill up with tears.

          “I can’t, dear. I promised to go back home this evening.”

          “You’re my only love. Who’s going to be with me if it’s not you? Who’s going to comfort me if I’m sad? And, who’s going to stay next to me always?”

          She covered her mouth with her palms and cried as I had done talking. I saw her slowly vanishing in front of me.

          “Remember your promise. Never ever cry for my death. Live your life for me. Whether I’m living or not, you will always be in my heart and soul, forever, passing through time. If you remember me always…”

          “I’ll forever remember you, Hazel Jennifer, forever and always.”

          As I gave out those promises, she came closer and hugged me tightly. I could barely feel her heartbeat.

          “I love you…”

         Those were her last words as she flew from my sight. I would keep that promise in my heart.

          I slowly opened my eyes. The light hurt my eyes. I looked around and realized that I was in a different place. There were no more pathways, and all I could see was a white room. I could see myself lying on a bed. Surprisingly, my parents and friends were around me. Why was I here? Then, slowly I remembered what had happened: about me trying to kill myself with a bottle of medicine… about me seeing Hazel in my dream… everything.

          I felt happy seeing my beloved ones around me. They were giving me the spirit to move on with my life. Starting from that day, I would live my life to the fullest. I won’t ever give up. I would strive to move on for Hazel’s sake.

         Days passed slowly ever since she left. I was sure she was eternally happy, watching over me. Though school was never the same again, I had a feeling that I would be happy too, one day.

         I looked up to the dark sky. Thousands of stars lighted up the sky. The full moon shone so brightly. And I could feel her next to me. She would forever be in my heart. My eternal gratitude to my guardian in heaven, Hazel Jennifer, with undying love and memories.

Done by,

Anne Aren Thomas

2 Achiever / 2012 :)